Our poll to discover who the public would like to see giving NHS management a good kicking over the standard of food served in our hospitals has already seen more than 900 votes cast. There is a worrying surge of support for the Blessed St Delia of Norwich. Our IT boffins are currently trying to trace the traffic to see if any vote rigging is going on. Ms Smith’s publicist, a Mr Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, claims St Delia’s popularity is grounded in the love of the grateful people of England for her. Meanwhile, Jamie Oliver’s popularity is slowing, but coming up on the inside are those loveable hairy bikers Si and Dave.
But we need more people to vote. There are just three days left before the polls close. So vote early and vote often! Er... no. Just vote the once. Are you listening, Delia?