I'm not too sure what a "Roly Poly" is supposed to look like, but that looks to me like something more usually found in a stagnant pond with a sad looking frog sitting on it. As far as I'm concerned, the only use for brussel sprouts is to kick start a compost bin. You poor, poor man....how do you stand it?
I've just been reading a few of your blogs after your bingo made the news down under in Oz. I work in a hospital and have not been able to stop crying because I'm laughing so hard - your blogs are so true. I particularly liked 'The buzz of being a patient'. Beware of that liquid covering your treacle Roly Poly - my boyfriend just looked at it and thinks it is the pus he drained from someones knee last week! Urgh! I'm always amazed at how bad food seems to taste and look when you have to make it for 50+ people - how hard is it to multiply quantities of a recipe - maybe you should forward the cuisine.com.au link to the kitchen. Keep up the good work - maintaining occupation helps to stay sane & get better. I look forward to reading about your culinary adventures, & especially the day you get to go home. Fiona
You are joking aren't you TM? Was that really described on the menu as Sunday Lunch? Who puts some identifiable meat / reconstituted stuff in breadcrumbs (if that indeed is what they are)on a Sunday Lunch plate? Where is the Roast Beef, Yorkshire Pudding, three fresh veg, mashed potatoe and most importantly the gravy? What is that transparent glue like stuff covering the hockey puck? Oh you poor thing, I need to get over there and cook you one of my Sunday lunches and fairly quickly by the look of things! Those roast potatoes look like they have been roasted to within an inch of their lives, you could make a catapult and use them for target practice, it's a wonder you didn't break your teeth on them! Linda, Tenerife x
I ate the 'chicken' in breadcrumbs. It was more like chicken spam. The potatoes were too dry and hard to eat while the sprouts were sodden and water-logged. That suff on the rock-hard hockey puck is meant to be custard. Looks more like the 5 litres of puss that the surgeons took out of my femur.
The pudding really was too hard to eat. I don't know what they do to it. Maybe they put that stuff you paint on rotten window frames to make them go hard.
Brave or what! I'd take my hat of to you if I were wearing one. The pudding is probably recycled....see if you can get hold a menu from about a month ago, see if they served the same thing back then:)
I think the meal on offer is a culmination of leftovers found in the pig swill bin from the previous week, the reason the 'chicken' is covered in breadcrumbs is to disguise its real identity. Do the sprouts glow in the dark - they look slightly radioactive to me. Perhaps its an easy way to administer radiotherapy.
The chicken was formed from scraps of chicken waste and mechanically recovered flesh before being shaped into a uniform flat slab of tastelessness. I did not eat the pudding. I tried one spoonful and feared for my cowned tooth.
Mmmm.....crumbed fish and potato wedges with a side of perfectly cooked brussel sprouts. My salivary glands have kicked into overdrive just looking at your photo. Deeeeeeeliiiiisshhhhous!! NOT!! Don't even get me started on the "dessert"!!
No wonder super bugs thrive in hospitals - they learn to grow balls in the kitchens before being served to the helpless, starving patients who have very little of hope of mounting a suitable defence to ward off the attack.
I work in a busy teaching hospital in the middle of Sydney, Australia and I have to say I'm pretty impressed with the food offered here. My mum was actually a patient for a month a little while ago and she ALWAYS complains about hospital food, however, to my great surprise, only complained twice during the whole time she was an inpatient.
I wish you a speedy recovery - or as much as is needed so that you can do the rest of your recuperating at home!!
Dear Traction Man, There are many wonderful organisations in the world willing to take up the fight for a good cause and yours is one of the most pressing I have seen to date. I think that not only should you check the menu from a month ago but have the food today tested to make sure it wasn't made then too! I tried losing weight on one of those weight loss programs with premade food and I can sympathise with you completely. After about 2 weeks I was craving my own cooking and fresh food. Why is your wife only coming in once a week? I'd be begging and annoying every relative and friend to bring in something edible and you'll soon have more than enough support for your cause; they'll want you to stop bugging them too!! Goodluck and hope you are well enough to visit Australia soon. Cheers!
Hi Lisa My wife works and lives two hours away. I was transferred to this hospital because it is a centre of excellence for people with my condition. It's not possible for here to make a four hour round trip after a day at work so that's why she only comes on Saturdays. But don't worry I'm sure things will get better now I'm drinking those yummy milkshake style food supplements.
I thought it was fish but alas it was chicken. A game of guess-what-it-is indeed. You poor man. That dessert is the worst of your pictures to date. That looks like rotten oyster floating in a bowl of pee.
To my surprise, on our ward we were given NHS-Sodexho "Catering Satisfaction" surveys this morning to fill out! Telling them exactly what I thought about the quality and choice of food available has made me feel better than I have in weeks! I wonder whether this has anything to do with the media coverage you generated, TM, as I've been here for 7 weeks so far and not seen these ever before, nor ever had a chance to give feedback on the food, save for unofficial ranting to the nurses.
It is a shame, though, because the catering staff themselves are really lovely, and they must know how shit the food they have to serve up is. And I just learned from my roommate that other hospitals provide microwaves for patients to reheat ready meals in! Oh, the luxury!!
Densnaps Writes >>>>>>>>>>>> Those milky ensure plus drinks are rather cloying (claggy) However there is a no milk version not so gag making all fruity try asking for that for an alternate. Your Sunday Lunch, Balanced I think not, Around 14 Brussels, two roast spuds or 4 halves? and the protein lump??? plus the high water content your not gonna get dehydrated are you ........ Keep blogging Well done the shtum nurses by the way
Soggy, overcooked sprouts, limp roast potatoes, crumb-disguised rendered meat and no gravy. Slab of hard suet with ersatz syrup / treacle, and a thin attempt at custard made with what seems like watered down milk.
Combined, I reckon that has the nutritional equivalent of a small cheese roll with one sliver of cheese and a torn shred of lettuce.
Despite the fact that the idea of a stodgy dessert is nice, it's just empty calories. No nutritional value there at all and simply feeds a bored patient's need for something sweet and sticky to take their mind off the ghastly first course.
Were the sprouts early crops or leftovers from last winter?
Can't you get Meals on Wheels to do a mercy mission?!
You poor man - shows how bad the nutrition is if you are now living on Ensure! Is there not a semi-decent takeaway place (pizza, whatever) that will make deliveries?
I splat on my front to read, and simply can't imagine how frustrating it must be to be forcibly flipped over and trussed up, even if it is in the best of causes. And soggy sprouts on top of that - fingers crossed for your X-ray!
In the early sixties I had the misfortune to spend nearly six months in an RAF hospital with necrotising faciitis. In those days it really was the kiss of death but I survived. I thought the food then was dreadful albeit edible. I went from 12 to 16 stones. Although probably mostly due to the beer my mates smuggled in.
Now, seeing today's offerings I feel I should belatedly apologise to those long suffering RAF cooks.
Don't despair, eventually you will recover and your ordeal will seem as a nightmare. One from which you will awaken, screaming, for many months to come.
I don't know if they will allow you to have wine with meals but your latest repast just pleads for the right selection. I would suggest a Tues Sept 8th 2009 off the rack new bottling of a Pear Ripple allowed to mellow to room temperature then mixed with a soupcon of Nehi Grape soda. Garnish with grumbled up moon pies.
Hope your day is whizzing by more quickly with all your virtual visitors and there's no need to keep yourself entertained counting the bricks in the wall opposite.
If you are interested in politics/taking the pee out of our leaders and who up and down - try visiting us at www.politicalbetting.com - the conversations go round 24/7 and are great for those with insomnia or across different time zones.
Hi, i can say which oh my gooooooooooddddd. Its a joke or. I think this is pudding with a big big pancake. Its look like this. I have a idea for you. Close your eyes and eat it if you wont to life :-)
Dear God the dessert is vile. The yellow gunge masquarading as custard (I presume it's custard) looks like what you would drain out of someone's knee after it's been liquified by a flesh-eating virus...Now off to puke. Don't get me started on the depressing looking main... This whole blog just re-enforces my belief that all hospital food is crap, and if ever in hospital for an extended period of time I would beg my mother to bring me nosh.
Do I spy a menu card? Go on, tell us what the choices are. I can't wait to guess from your photo which one you opted for.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what that thing in the middle is. Is it a cake?
ReplyDeleteI'm not too sure what a "Roly Poly" is supposed to look like, but that looks to me like something more usually found in a stagnant pond with a sad looking frog sitting on it. As far as I'm concerned, the only use for brussel sprouts is to kick start a compost bin. You poor, poor man....how do you stand it?
ReplyDeleteI've just been reading a few of your blogs after your bingo made the news down under in Oz. I work in a hospital and have not been able to stop crying because I'm laughing so hard - your blogs are so true. I particularly liked 'The buzz of being a patient'.
ReplyDeleteBeware of that liquid covering your treacle Roly Poly - my boyfriend just looked at it and thinks it is the pus he drained from someones knee last week! Urgh! I'm always amazed at how bad food seems to taste and look when you have to make it for 50+ people - how hard is it to multiply quantities of a recipe - maybe you should forward the cuisine.com.au link to the kitchen.
Keep up the good work - maintaining occupation helps to stay sane & get better. I look forward to reading about your culinary adventures, & especially the day you get to go home.
Fiona
It's meat... of a sorts.
ReplyDeleteYou are joking aren't you TM? Was that really described on the menu as Sunday Lunch? Who puts some identifiable meat / reconstituted stuff in breadcrumbs (if that indeed is what they are)on a Sunday Lunch plate? Where is the Roast Beef, Yorkshire Pudding, three fresh veg, mashed potatoe and most importantly the gravy? What is that transparent glue like stuff covering the hockey puck? Oh you poor thing, I need to get over there and cook you one of my Sunday lunches and fairly quickly by the look of things! Those roast potatoes look like they have been roasted to within an inch of their lives, you could make a catapult and use them for target practice, it's a wonder you didn't break your teeth on them!
ReplyDeleteLinda, Tenerife x
Did you eat any of it? I'd be very wary of any meat products...
ReplyDeleteI just fed my dog... PAL (brand) Casserole Beef & Gravy - I think I know where the goulash came from
ReplyDeleteFiona
I ate the 'chicken' in breadcrumbs. It was more like chicken spam. The potatoes were too dry and hard to eat while the sprouts were sodden and water-logged. That suff on the rock-hard hockey puck is meant to be custard. Looks more like the 5 litres of puss that the surgeons took out of my femur.
ReplyDeleteThe pudding really was too hard to eat. I don't know what they do to it. Maybe they put that stuff you paint on rotten window frames to make them go hard.
ReplyDeleteIt's no wonder the bugs restrict themselves to eating bone and flesh. They obviously wouldn't touch the hospital food.
ReplyDeleteA chicken burger without a bun .. .. .. were you offered any kind of sauce / gravy / mayo?
ReplyDeleteNo sauce or Mayo on offer. Not even mustard.
ReplyDeleteBrave or what! I'd take my hat of to you if I were wearing one.
ReplyDeleteThe pudding is probably recycled....see if you can get hold a menu from about a month ago, see if they served the same thing back then:)
Maybe you were suppose to use your own blood as dressing... and at least the Brussel Sprouts were recognisable.
ReplyDeleteHope your recovery is going well.
Brussels sprouts in September? They should not be seen on a plate until after the first frost.
ReplyDeleteLooks to me as if you were served an early Christmas Day luncheon.
I expect they're practising.
Oh was that chicken? I thought it was a piece of toast. I wondered what it was doing as part of Sunday lunch. What bit of chicken is that shape?
ReplyDeleteAnything that heavily crumbed is hiding something! Ditto on the custard.
ReplyDeleteYou didn't eat it did you?
I think the meal on offer is a culmination of leftovers found in the pig swill bin from the previous week, the reason the 'chicken' is covered in breadcrumbs is to disguise its real identity. Do the sprouts glow in the dark - they look slightly radioactive to me. Perhaps its an easy way to administer radiotherapy.
ReplyDeleteThe chicken was formed from scraps of chicken waste and mechanically recovered flesh before being shaped into a uniform flat slab of tastelessness. I did not eat the pudding. I tried one spoonful and feared for my cowned tooth.
ReplyDeleteCrowned not cowed!
ReplyDeleteMmmm.....crumbed fish and potato wedges with a side of perfectly cooked brussel sprouts. My salivary glands have kicked into overdrive just looking at your photo. Deeeeeeeliiiiisshhhhous!! NOT!!
ReplyDeleteDon't even get me started on the "dessert"!!
No wonder super bugs thrive in hospitals - they learn to grow balls in the kitchens before being served to the helpless, starving patients who have very little of hope of mounting a suitable defence to ward off the attack.
I work in a busy teaching hospital in the middle of Sydney, Australia and I have to say I'm pretty impressed with the food offered here. My mum was actually a patient for a month a little while ago and she ALWAYS complains about hospital food, however, to my great surprise, only complained twice during the whole time she was an inpatient.
I wish you a speedy recovery - or as much as is needed so that you can do the rest of your recuperating at home!!
Dear Traction Man,
ReplyDeleteThere are many wonderful organisations in the world willing to take up the fight for a good cause and yours is one of the most pressing I have seen to date. I think that not only should you check the menu from a month ago but have the food today tested to make sure it wasn't made then too! I tried losing weight on one of those weight loss programs with premade food and I can sympathise with you completely. After about 2 weeks I was craving my own cooking and fresh food. Why is your wife only coming in once a week? I'd be begging and annoying every relative and friend to bring in something edible and you'll soon have more than enough support for your cause; they'll want you to stop bugging them too!! Goodluck and hope you are well enough to visit Australia soon. Cheers!
Hi Lisa
ReplyDeleteMy wife works and lives two hours away. I was transferred to this hospital because it is a centre of excellence for people with my condition. It's not possible for here to make a four hour round trip after a day at work so that's why she only comes on Saturdays. But don't worry I'm sure things will get better now I'm drinking those yummy milkshake style food supplements.
I thought it was fish but alas it was chicken. A game of guess-what-it-is indeed. You poor man. That dessert is the worst of your pictures to date. That looks like rotten oyster floating in a bowl of pee.
ReplyDeleteIts funny how when you post facts that people label them as your opinion EVEN if the proof is in the pudding per se.
ReplyDeleteGet well soon
You might get a few more comments from Down Under as you were featured in the press here at the end of last week:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.theage.com.au/technology/technology-news/disgusting-hospital-food-gets-a-serve-on-bingo-blog-20090918-fula.html
Thanks for the dessert picture - not sure my constitution can cope with more horrors like that!
ReplyDeleteEnsure Plus? I used to love those, I would have two for lunch if I couldnt sit down and eat on a working day.
ReplyDeleteThey are the bomb but they are not everything.
You need decent wholesome nutritious food.
And sunlight.
the second picture seems like a Yuck Supreme with this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWXnfGgpnLY
ReplyDeleteEnjoy!
To my surprise, on our ward we were given NHS-Sodexho "Catering Satisfaction" surveys this morning to fill out! Telling them exactly what I thought about the quality and choice of food available has made me feel better than I have in weeks! I wonder whether this has anything to do with the media coverage you generated, TM, as I've been here for 7 weeks so far and not seen these ever before, nor ever had a chance to give feedback on the food, save for unofficial ranting to the nurses.
ReplyDeleteIt is a shame, though, because the catering staff themselves are really lovely, and they must know how shit the food they have to serve up is. And I just learned from my roommate that other hospitals provide microwaves for patients to reheat ready meals in! Oh, the luxury!!
Densnaps Writes
ReplyDelete>>>>>>>>>>>>
Those milky ensure plus drinks are rather cloying (claggy) However there is a no milk version not so gag making all fruity try asking for that for an alternate.
Your Sunday Lunch, Balanced I think not,
Around 14 Brussels, two roast spuds or 4 halves? and the protein lump??? plus the high water content your not gonna get dehydrated are you ........
Keep blogging
Well done the shtum nurses by the way
You feature on a number of Australian websites. Hopefully this will help to get the Hospital staff to sit up and listen. I wish you well.
ReplyDelete[boring rant]
ReplyDeleteSoggy, overcooked sprouts, limp roast potatoes, crumb-disguised rendered meat and no gravy. Slab of hard suet with ersatz syrup / treacle, and a thin attempt at custard made with what seems like watered down milk.
Combined, I reckon that has the nutritional equivalent of a small cheese roll with one sliver of cheese and a torn shred of lettuce.
Despite the fact that the idea of a stodgy dessert is nice, it's just empty calories. No nutritional value there at all and simply feeds a bored patient's need for something sweet and sticky to take their mind off the ghastly first course.
[/boring rant]
What progress on the leg.
Leg is cooking slowly. X-ray soon to check on progress. Hate sleeping on my back all year. Impossible to curl up with a good book.
ReplyDeleteWere the sprouts early crops or leftovers from last winter?
ReplyDeleteCan't you get Meals on Wheels to do a mercy mission?!
You poor man - shows how bad the nutrition is if you are now living on Ensure! Is there not a semi-decent takeaway place (pizza, whatever) that will make deliveries?
Hope your leg continues to improve!
I splat on my front to read, and simply can't imagine how frustrating it must be to be forcibly flipped over and trussed up, even if it is in the best of causes. And soggy sprouts on top of that - fingers crossed for your X-ray!
ReplyDeleteChin up Traction Man.
ReplyDeleteIn the early sixties I had the misfortune to spend nearly six months in an RAF hospital with necrotising faciitis. In those days it really was the kiss of death but I survived. I thought the food then was dreadful albeit edible. I went from 12 to 16 stones.
Although probably mostly due to the beer my mates smuggled in.
Now, seeing today's offerings I feel I should belatedly apologise to those long suffering RAF cooks.
Don't despair, eventually you will recover and your ordeal will seem as a nightmare.
One from which you will awaken, screaming, for many months to come.
Best wishes,
Ex-Pat Alfie
Hi TM,
ReplyDeleteAll week they have been giving you unidentifiable food stuffs with some kind of sauce/gravy, yet when you need it you don't get any!!
As for your "meat" - didn't Jamie get that stopped being served up in our schools? Now we know where this stuff got to.
Chin up and I hope you get well real soon!
I also send wishes for a fast and full recovery.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if they will allow you to have wine with meals but your latest repast just pleads for the right selection. I would suggest a Tues Sept 8th 2009 off the rack new bottling of a Pear Ripple allowed to mellow to room temperature then mixed with a soupcon of Nehi Grape soda. Garnish with grumbled up moon pies.
Paula
Hope your day is whizzing by more quickly with all your virtual visitors and there's no need to keep yourself entertained counting the bricks in the wall opposite.
ReplyDeleteIf you are interested in politics/taking the pee out of our leaders and who up and down - try visiting us at www.politicalbetting.com - the conversations go round 24/7 and are great for those with insomnia or across different time zones.
Toodlepip
Plato
Dare I say that your Treacle Roly Poly looks like it is sitting in a bath of lard...?
ReplyDeleteDare I say that your Treacle Roly Poly looks like it is sitting in a bath of lard...?
ReplyDeleteHi, i can say which oh my gooooooooooddddd. Its a joke or. I think this is pudding with a big big pancake. Its look like this.
ReplyDeleteI have a idea for you. Close your eyes and eat it if you wont to life :-)
The brussel sprouts look like little green hand grenades.
ReplyDeleteAnd ugh... the dessert bears a striking resemblance to the lunger some kind soul had hawked up on the pavement this morning.
Dear God the dessert is vile. The yellow gunge masquarading as custard (I presume it's custard) looks like what you would drain out of someone's knee after it's been liquified by a flesh-eating virus...Now off to puke. Don't get me started on the depressing looking main... This whole blog just re-enforces my belief that all hospital food is crap, and if ever in hospital for an extended period of time I would beg my mother to bring me nosh.
ReplyDelete